Please read this first
WARNING MAY BE TRIGGERING. PLEASE EXERCISE CAUTION
TESTIMONY OF CHILDHOOD SATANIC ABUSE IN PERTH, WESTERN AUSTRALIA .
FROM A RECOVERING VICTIM.
PART ONE
"I was born in Cottesloe-Devonleigh Hospital on ****** and raised in Mosman Park. My father's paternal family was the ***** and the ***** on his mother's side. Her family was graziers, her father was a banker and her uncle was the Premier, *****. T***** who was my father's father was a serious alcoholic and gambler, and my grandmother divorced him after he began to steal from the house to pay for his addictions - furniture etc. My mum's family was a poorer but highly intelligent and educated family; my father married my mother when she was 17 and he 15 years older. He married her because all his friends were getting married and he and others thought that she was the most beautiful girl in society at the time. The family I was from was an upper middle class family; my dad worked for ***** until when I was about 7 when he lost his job suddenly and then had a nervous breakdown. What I have heard is that he and a colleague, ***** were involved with something unorthodox. Something had come out. My father was supposedly blamed or scapegoated and maybe considered a bit of a liability and he was sacked. I think this was towards the end of the satanic abuse activity, which I was involved in, when he decided not to continue being in that group, maybe the sacking came before, maybe after. This might have been around 1967, before then, I recall when I was a very little baby my dad coming home late at night. Dad would go out drinking with men until late at night and leave mum at home. She had had her first daughter at 17 and her second -me at 20. He had left her at home alone a lot since they were first married and she said she was very lonely and distressed at the abandonment she experienced. He would go out drinking with all these men from *****Club, his business associates. He went to ***** School and some of them were old boys from ***** School who had kept in a group together as they progressed into their business careers. Some of them were (lists a number of names). These were all people who came from families who were well established in society and at the head of businesses and firms, influential and well known families.
Anyway dad did a lot of socialising, sailing and drinking at that ***** Club, especially after work and on the weekends. He used to come home late at night and put his penis down my throat while my mum was asleep and I was a little baby on my own in a separate room, in a bassinet. So my first memories of this were of being suffocated - of not being able to breathe, choking and gagging - and my dad doing that. Then the sorts of memories that I have after are my father and my godfather, ***** and my mum, this was when I was about 3 - 4 years old, in my room at night. My godfather who was short with very dark thick hair was doing a really strange dance like a spider in front of me - from side to side in a horrible way, he seemed drunk or drugged. They must have been taking a lot of pills, which they may have got through one of the men *****, who was a chemist and a friend of ***** whose father was a chemist. They had me tied onto the bed and he would hurt me and my dad did too. My mum was up at my head, at the end of the bed and she had to watch - they were all drunk or drugged and they both had sex with her too. They raped me anally or tore me there because I remember my rectum tearing and me leaving my body and saw down below and the bed was full of blood - my mum was screaming and I think they thought they might have killed me because I was unconscious. They panicked and picked me up - wrapped my bottom in a towel and carried me outside to the car. They took me to a doctor's surgery on ***** *****, Claremont - our family surgery and the doctor stitched me up. But he didn't do it in the surgery, it was in a room adjoining - a flat maybe behind where he was living - because there were newspapers stacked around and they put me on a table. He stitched me there but that might not have been a rectal thing - it might have been a vaginal thing. It's just that there is so much that I might not be telling it in the right order - different memories merge into others, it's just as it comes. My mother got very, very depressed at some point and she started taking Mogadon and Valium to sleep. So often if you called out in the middle of the night - I remember crying a lot in the middle of the night and I would call out to her because I was scared - she wouldn't come or she would call out " Go back to sleep," in an angry way. I feel like my dad used to abuse us while she was drugged out - she got to the point where her life was so miserable that she drugged herself because she couldn't sleep. I think this was at the time that they would abuse her too. They had directly involved her in the satanic abuse. I have a terrible memory of my mother hanging by her wrists from a concrete wall, she was hanging from above ground level. The place seemed like a big stadium - like Perry Lakes and it was the entrance to the change rooms or toilet/shower area. She was naked and unconscious, they had whipped her on her back and she had done diarrhoea down her legs and her head was slumped to one shoulder like Jesus is depicted. I was hysterical because I thought she was dead - that they had actually killed her. I feel that at this point my mother may have had a major breakdown and psychosis, where she split and stopped being able to remember this today. They abused their wives and each other's wives as much as they abused theirs and each other's children. I don't remember my dad abusing me directly in the satanic meetings they took us to but I remember other men and women abusing me more. I used to have these dreams where I would hear my mother calling me to get up in the middle of the night because we were all leaving but I was too tired to wake up. They would eventually drive off and leave me behind. In the dream I would look out of the bedroom window to see them driving off without me. I would panic because they were all I had in the world there was no one else to look after me. I used to have this feeling when I was little of being awake in the middle of the night and of being so tired and exhausted, desperate to be able to get some sleep. Of needing to sleep but of not being allowed to. That's why this dream re-occurred because the amount of tiredness was something I finally couldn't resist.
My mother used to drug us for her convenience say on Christmas Eve and times when she wanted us to go to sleep quickly at night and not wake up too early the next day. She gave us Phenergan right from when we were little babies and small anti-histamine pills later when we were small children - my older sister would tell me to spit it down the sink. She knew what it was and being 2 years older than me she knew not to trust my mother like I did. My mother didn't like her because - since she was very little my father had had a relationship with her that had caused my mum to feel excluded. I think my mum denied that to herself but just hated my sister and concentrated her affection on me - she would say that I was her favourite. I was so scared of her that I would do anything she said - she was a violent woman. I think apart from my mum saying my sister and her were too alike - my mum was very childlike emotionally and she psychologically thought jealously, that my sister had taken dad away from her, instead of seeing my sister as the victim child of his affections and attention. So my sister was very protective of me and I had blocked everything as it happened so that I was very naive and took whatever I was given and did exactly as I was told. I didn't dare rebel, unless my sister designed a way that was safe and led me.
I remember needles and my horror of them. I remember these injections, of being woken up to a needle. What I think they did was inject us to keep us sedated while they took us out somewhere in the middle of the night and I think the dreams I had were a trigger to that memory.
